Memoria
by indavant
Summary: Fairy tales not always end with 'happily ever after'. / GermanyxNorthItaly / sho-ai / death chara /


Sure we're going to be together. Right?

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 **Disclaimer :**

Hetalia © Hidekaz Himaruya

Memory © indavant

 **Enjoy!**

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The German sighed as the continuous dream repeated again that night. The dream was blurry, all he could see was nothing but a silhouette of two people. His eyes took a glance to the digital clock above the table next to his bed. Knowing it was around 2 at dawn, he tried to close his eyes again when he felt something next to his body. The eyes were brought wide open as he turned the head.

Seeing a brunette sleeping next to him was an usual thing to him. The Italian who was always sleeping there, of course without his permission, always made his heart jump faster.

Even if the blonde German, Ludwig, had used to seeing the scenery, still he felt surprised for a few seconds before his yelling annoy the sleeping brunette Italian, Feliciano.

"Feliciano Vargas! Go back to your room!" Ludwig was already fed up with his own shouting as he saw Feliciano, sleeping on the other side of his bed. Just now had he thought why did he even left the other side hat Feliciano could be sleeping there.

Slowly, Feliciano got up, sitting on the bed, rubbing his eyes. Tilting the head, he smiled, "Ve~? Why is Doitsu getting up so early in the morning? Isn't it just 2 in the morning?"

Ludwig shut his eyes, letting heavy sigh came out, "No, never mind. Just ... get back to your room."

"Ve~? Is Ludwig hurting anywhere, ve~?" Ludwig didn't answer the question which made Feliciano slightly pouted. The sapphire were slowly became visible, finding disappointment from the other. Snorted as he scratch his head.

"I'm fine, that's why just go to your room." Ludwig's heavy voice had now soften.

"I'm glad that you're not ill, ve. I'm very worried if you are, Ludwig." Feliciano's face became cheerful as before. He then threw his body next to Ludwig's. The taller could just sigh, letting the smaller body lie beside him.

* * *

Memories are just too sweet that it tastes like dreams.

* * *

"Good morning, Doitsu! Have you had any good night's sleep, ve? I've prepared today's breakfast." With his bright smile, Feliciano pulled the chair across the one he had, only separated with a table. After he did, he went to sit on his own seat and started to enjoy the breakfast.

As the breakfast went on, no less than often that Feliciano started conversation topics. From the most important things to the most unimportant ones, from the most obvious things to the most not obvious ones were told that he dominated most of the conversation, as usual.

That morning, as before, was passed by Feliciano who ordered Ludwig to finish his jobs so that they could go together to walk with Ludwig's dogs. Feliciano than went outside the house and sat where he could. In front of him was a white, pure canvas, on his right hand was a palette and brush, on the other was a box filled with paint.

A hum started as he began to give the canvas colours using the colour-stained brush. Painting while humming notes of his favourite song never succeeded to make him bored, even if he had done it almost everyday.

His thoughts were not there, despite that his body was there. Without his knowing, the canvas had started to be filled with colours that he was suddenly startled and saw the canvas clearly.

His hand which had put the colours unconsciously drew a depiction. There were two people. Both facing the same direction, showing their backs to Feliciano. One of them used a white-and-green-dominated clothes, while the other used a cape. A black one. The first person, who wore a maid-like clothes, was looking at the other with an unwilling expression.

Realizing it, Feliciano took the canvas, brought it to his hug as tears started to flow on his cheeks.

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There's nothing sweeter than candies and honey, but your smile beats the sweetness.

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Ludwig woke up to feel uneasy first thing in the morning. Sitting as he realised Feliciano was there. His hand was put on top of his body. Ludwig sitting made the hand moved a little.

Feliciano woke up from his sleep and found Ludwig's redden face. He yawned then tilted his head.

"Ve~? Your face is red, Ludwig. Do you feel dizzy, ve?" Ludwig didn't answer and the reaction of his made Feliciano bring his hands. The back of the right one was brought to create slight touch to Ludwig's forehead, the other was on his own.

"Your body temperature is hotter than mine, ve. You should be taking rest today, don't force yourself, okay?" With a little bit force, he put Ludwig's body back to sleep. Feliciano walked outside from Ludwig's room after told Ludwig that he was going to get warm water and make some porridge.

Ludwig waited in his room in silence. His eyes stared at his room's wall though there was no soul within. His body still remained above his white bed though there was no spirit within.

Blinking, getting his consciousness back as his ears heard squeaking on his door. It opened, showing Feliciano's small figure standing over there with two bowls, one filled with warm water, the other porridge, a glass of transparent liquid, and a few of medicine on metal trays.

Ludwig's blonde locks moved as his head turned to Feliciano. Those sapphires kept observing every movement Feliciano made. Feliciano then sat next to Ludwig, with his usual smile plastered on his lips. With his relatively thin hand, he fed the porridge slowly until it remained half the bowl.

Both of them moved in silence. Feliciano brought the glass filled with water to Ludwig who drank it slowly. Then Feliciano let Ludwig drink his medicine so that his dizziness would go before he let Ludwig drank his water again.

His built-body was pushed then by Feliciano so he could get some sleep. A cloth that was dipped in the warm water he had brought before, was pulled out and let it touch Ludwig's forehead after he squeezed it, letting some water go.

Few seconds after, Ludwig opened his lips, but before he let any sound come out, Feliciano put his point finger in front of his lips signing that Ludwig wasn't supposed to talk.

"Resting once in a while won't hurt, right?" That certain smile was there again. And with the smile of course Ludwig could let his eyelids cover the sapphires.

* * *

A dream has a bit chance to repeat, as a memory does.

* * *

Feliciano woke up from his sleep, realising he had dreamt something about the past. Memories in the past, which hurt his heart, which made him blame himself for everything had he done, which was a nightmare for him at night.

The fact that people told these days didn't mean for him, that dreams were not supposed to be repeating often. The dream, though, always there every night that haunt him with guilt. Which brought him to the deepest sadness, that trigger him to cry, which made his eyes that filled with happiness before turned to guit and sadness now.

The dream was repeated that night. He gripped the material that covered his body, specifically in front of his chest that starting to hurt its owner. He sat on top of his beloved German's bed, who he never wanted to let go.

Crying all night long in silence, as he didn't want to disturb the owner of the bed. He closed his face with a blanket that wrapped his body before.

Regret filled both his soul and body when he was still alive after the occurrence that reappeared in his dreams; nightmares. He didn't understand anymore. He just wanted him to come back. Back to him, to his embraces every night. Brought back his smiles, his laughs. Brought back his sanity so that he could continue living his life.

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Because where there are greetings, there will be farewells.

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The Italian was surprised as he met the German's sapphires' gaze. The ray from the sun suddenly pushed within, touching his face softly when the darkness from the box was shattered, followed by a man's silhouette.

When the man's head blocked the sun from his sight, he found a strong figure of a man in front of him.

The first meeting was fated for both of them. Let the time brought them to their separation later. Because meetings would always end with separations, either it was for a short time or for always.

It was the same that he had met someone other than him in the past. Fate had separated them anyway. He had already forgotten how to survive if he was going to lose someone for twice, but what could he do anyway, the strong-figured man in front of him had already given him help.

That was why he let himself to be brought into meeting someone again and was willing to do anything so that this man would be with him always.

Yes, this man was the chosen one, this man; Ludwig.

* * *

Fate is always real. But why is fate not letting us be together?

* * *

Rain poured down, making the world wet along with his tears that flowed on his cheeks. A piece of cloth that smeared with blood was gripped too hard as it was disheveled. His legs were going limp and he fell on top of the wet ground, staining his pants and boots he had worn.

In front of him stood a man, looking sad though the expression didn't do well to express it. The man kneeled before him and brought him to a tight embrace. He himself could feel sadness the hugged one felt. Anyone could not deny that the owner of the piece of clothes was dear to the hugged one, more then anyone, anything.

When the guy had received the clothes' piece, his tears flowed down, knowing that the owner of the cloth would never come back to his embrace, to his vicion for real.

So, he started to imagine, imagine when the cloth's owner was living with him, imagine when he would always get scolded when he went inside the cloth's owner secretly, imagine when he would always have their breakfast together, imagine when he painted as the cloth's owner was working, imagine when he would always hug and greet the cloth's owner every morning, imagine when he would always say good night, imagine, and kept imagining about the life he'd had together with the cloth's owner, when the cloth's owner was still alive.

"Doitsu, this morning I found a sparrow on the tree, I climbed it and look," he opened his hands and a sparrow was there within, "I picked it," he laughed happily but then it changed into a sad one, "but I fell down because I slipped. Fortunately, the sparrow wasn't hurt anywhere."

"I-I'm sorry, Doitsu. I just want to spend time with you."

"Enjoy your meal, Doitsu. You must have been tired after working all these times. That's why I made your favourite food. _Buon appetito_."

"Ah, you need to work, right? Okay, I won't be disturbing you. I will paint outside so just call me after you're done with your work."

"Doitsu! Good morning," his hand moved to be opened and it closed after he felt like he had been hugged.

"Good night, Doitsu, I will sleep first. You still want to do some work? Go get some rest, it's already late."

Fate had never let them be together.

Or is it just for a while?

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 **A/N :**

This fic is dedicated to a friend of mine. It was supposed to be Indonesian but this friend of mine wanted it in English, so, yeah.

Well, what do you think? Please put your thoughts on the review below. Thanks.

Finished by _indavant_ [12.12.15]


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